Linda | 
02 3rd, 2010| 
I’ve been blue and I’m guessing this will be my general status quo for a while. I’m very much a type 7 kind of person so I don’t do very well sitting on my couch and feeling sorry for myself. I’m the kind of person who when faced with bad moods and heartache, I do my best to battle it with good times and reflecting on blessings. I cackle extra hard at mediocre jokes and I seek adventure. I’ve jumped out of planes and shot guns and traveled all in the spirit of avoiding pain. I’m pretty open to new experiences, but especially so when faced with adversity.
Although this is how I am, I don’t think it’s exactly healthy. I think we have to let ourselves mourn and feel what we feel now so that it’ll eventually run empty. It doesn’t mean I have to like it when my melancholy catches up to me and holds me in a lingering embrace. Actually it felt more like an unwelcomed, crushing bear hug. And that’s exactly what it did yesterday. The afterglow of my weekend in Houston wore off and I just felt extremely sad. All day. Most of the night. I’m a pretty rational person and I know bad times (and obviously good times) will pass. It’s just that I’m fucking impatient.
In the spirit of being more healthy about my coping with pain, I sat yesterday and bore the depression during work hours. Then, true to form I tried to use it as a trigger to propel me away. I completed tasks I was avoiding because I figured, hell, I’m having a bad day anyway, let’s just get this all out of the way. I cried my way through it and eventually made it to bed.
Here I am this morning. Ready to face it again. Tonight I’m meeting up an old/new group of friends and cooking something. Don’t know what yet. You know, to distract myself.
To nurse that afterglow I mentioned, I’m going to post random fun pictures from my weekend in Houston. (I have a progressive meal series to work on posting as well).
This picture makes me laugh out loud. I accidentally grabbed his butt right at the very second the picture was snapped. I thought it was his back! I did this to Jessica earlier that same day too. Oi.
Texas native. Living and working in Austin, TX. Twenty something. In hot pursuit of good food, adventure, and laughter. Dreams of owning her own place with a big giant library.
February 3rd, 2010 at 12:27 pm
I talk to you.
February 3rd, 2010 at 3:13 pm
I wallow in it which never works. Then, I talk to anybody and everybody I can who might know something to help bring me out of it and eventually it does.
I think exerting your energy elsewhere is good, though. It still means you’re doing something, and hopefully that means it won’t last as long.
February 3rd, 2010 at 4:16 pm
Drink wine and manhandle my cats.
That may not work for you. ;-)
Feel better soon!
February 3rd, 2010 at 4:42 pm
meffy, :)
PSD, wallow in it. Hmmm. i’m afraid to try it because it may swallow me. lol but perhaps i’ll try it.
lilu. i need to buy a bottle of wine. and find something to manhandle hahaha
February 3rd, 2010 at 5:22 pm
I do a few things…well a bunch actually. I like to do something productive, or just something I’ve been meaning to do for awhile, whether it’s cleaning or calling up a friend or catching up on a tv show.
It depends on the source of my feelings, but in this case, I do think it’s a good idea to get a good cry and think about the source of your feelings and how to overcome them.
Oh! Have you ever seen the pictures on Big Picture? Last time I went on the page, I was looking through Haiti pictures and it made me feel like I should be thankful for what I do have. It also made me cry, it was just so heartbreaking to see what these people had to go through.
Anyway, I could go on and on but I’ll stop there for now. By the way, did you purposely not resize the photos? Just wondering.
February 3rd, 2010 at 5:28 pm
Jess,
I guess i do have a handful of projects to refocus on. maybe i’ll start tomorrow.
I haven’t discovered Big Picture yet. Am on my way home. Another to do. thanks for the ideas!
so the pictures were saved off of ryan’s facebook and then my camera and i think the proportions are different and i was too lazy to make them the same. i just resized them to be similar. hehe oops?
February 3rd, 2010 at 5:43 pm
Hehe, it’s really easy to resize them to match by adding to the html, I can tell you how if you don’t already know! =)
I went to that site and took the RHETI sampler test– my top 3 in order: Type 2 (The Helper), Type 6 (The Loyalist), and Type 8 (The Challenger). Haha, interesting test. I love taking these personality tests!
February 3rd, 2010 at 5:44 pm
Oh yeah, and maybe you subconsciously just like grabbing ass. =D
February 3rd, 2010 at 7:16 pm
jessica,
maybe i’ll do that. wouldn’t it mess with the proportions if i hardcode the width and height?
hahaha man. Again, i’m sorry i grabbed your ass. how creepy of me. i hope this doesnt deter you from any more outings with me. ;)
-linda
February 3rd, 2010 at 7:21 pm
If you only set one (just width) and don’t set anything for the other, then it’ll automatically adjust to stay proportionate.
Lol, it’d take more than ass-grabbing to deter me. =P
February 3rd, 2010 at 7:59 pm
I let myself eat all the carbs and junk food I want, I watch movies with strong and independent female lead characters, and I read your blog! :)
So many people are dependent on you, and there are even more in the blogverse who come to your site everyday. Please know that you aren’t alone.
February 3rd, 2010 at 9:11 pm
jess, thanks for the tip! I resized them and it looks so much better. do you agree with your enneagram?
jessilyn, hi friend!
thank you for your kindness and support. i’m watching a lot of ally mcbeal.
and speaking of junk food, i had a lot of cookies today…
February 4th, 2010 at 12:21 am
it depends on how down i am.
usually an email (or, if really bad, a call) to you is the first step.
the really bad days, i tend to bury myself under the blankets on my bed and sleep for hours on end. you can’t feel pain if you’re not conscious. i’ll spend an entire day in bed if it really hurts.
i used to make worse decisions when coping with shit back in college days (binge drinking, hitting things, crying in my car, revenge hook-ups) but i think the email and sleep thing is healthier.
February 4th, 2010 at 12:38 am
p.s. the pics from thomas’s camera look good! i may need you to email them to me. :)
February 4th, 2010 at 12:44 am
kim,
i’m very thankful to have you in my life. i email you too and i just heart dump on you.
sleep. i DON’T sleep when sad. i’ve been getting four hours average, at worst 1.
you’ve moved me to shower (it’s almost midnight) so i can be more ready for bed.
i’ve seen you grown from college! I’m glad we’re both more well adjusted :p haha
man. memories.
LOVE,
linda
February 19th, 2010 at 4:47 pm
I go to the beach to relax .
February 19th, 2010 at 4:51 pm
i guess the best i could do for beach in Austin, is go to the lake.
:) thanks for coming by.