and try to love the questions themselves,
like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue.
Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you
because you would not be able to live them.
And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now.
Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it,
live along some distant day into the answer.”
â€” Rainer Maria Rilke
- I’ve been sick since Saturday. Complete with fever and three days of the sweats and shivers. It not only has ruined my weekend but I can’t stop hacking.
- I haven’t kissed Alan in about three weeks. First he was sick, and now I’m sick.
- I don’t know where I’m living come August. In a week it’ll be a month from move-out date. I’m moving in with Alan. We only started looking last weekend. We can look again this weekend for places, but next weekend I won’t even be in town.
- I turn 28 in exactly a month.
- I don’t know how much my new bumper will cost me. I’m taking it to a body shop in Houston next weekend.
- I haven’t had coffee in 4 days.
- A trip to Canada is suddenly a strong possibility and real soon. Not knowing when and when to ask off is throwing me off.
- There’s a lot going on in the upcoming weekends that are inherently fun. Hello? A mini girl’s trip to Dallas? Meeting some Totes Awesome Channel vloggers? Going to Canada? Turning 28? Celebrating mom’s birthday? Moving in with a boyfriend for the first time? It’s just the back to back weekends that are overwhelming me. I have to constantly remind myself that the anxiety comes from juggling very good things.
- Not having a spending plan in place for the second half of the year. Without knowing what my rent will look like or how much a dog will cost us, I have no idea what the paycheck breakdown will look like. Oh yes, we’re looking at dogs too.
- I haven’t been saving for at least 3 months. I’m such an automatic saver but with car troubles this year and a fun trip to Boston, I haven’t been putting anything in the savings account. This makes me feel a little wonky.